How Resilient Are You? Let's find out...
Updated: May 2
re·sil·ient • /rəˈzilyənt/ • (adjective):
able to withstand or recover quickly from difficult conditions
Resilience is the ability to manage stress and cope in healthy ways. It’s the ability to return to your personal “normal” after a stressful time. It doesn’t mean that you don’t get sad or hurt or anxious…it means that you know how to process all those feelings and recover quickly.
Resilience is critical during and after divorce. It can mean the difference between being stuck in sadness, anger, and despair and getting up and moving on into the future.
How Resilient Are YOU??
Here's a short self assessment. Give yourself 1 point for each characteristic that you think generally describes you.
•I have a positive attitude (1 point)
•I am self-awareness (1 point)
•I can find meaning in negative events (1 point)
•I have hope for the future (1 point)
•I understand and prioritize self care (1 point)
•I have a support network (1 point)
•I build my confidence (1 point)
•I know that I take better care of others when I take care of myself (1 point)
•I engage in relaxing activities and do things they enjoy (1 point)
•I exercise and eat well most of the time (1 point)
There are 10 point possible...How did you do? Are you happy with your score? If you’re not, don’t be discouraged. Did you know that resilience is something that can be learned and practice and increased?
Here are a few ideas for improving your resiliency as you move through the divorce process:
•Get physical exercise and let the endorphins flow
•Embrace change and accept that nothing stays the same. Seek meaning in hardships and loss
•Develop strong personal connections and create a supportive social environment
•Be helpful to others
•Remember that resilience is strengthened when you encounter resistance. Consider that the purpose of difficult feelings might be to help you grow,
By Rebecca Wolf
Divorce Recovery Coach
Certified Life Coach
Founder of Her Divorce Project